Sorry, no online dictionaries contain the exact phrase refuse to suck it up and admit defeat.

Reverse dictionary results:
1. persist
2. resist
3. persevere
4. hold out
5. stand firm
6. perseverate
7. survive
8. abide
9. abide by
10. aby
11. abyde
12. await
13. bear out
14. continue
15. digest
16. endure
17. expect
18. follow
19. forestay
20. hold
21. hold back
22. hold forth
23. hold in
24. hold over
25. hold true
26. hold up
27. holdout
28. keep
29. keep faith
30. keep from
31. last
32. live through
33. maintain
34. overhold
35. perdure
36. perpetuate
37. push on
38. remain
39. retain

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You can look up the words in the phrase individually using these links:   refuse ?   to ?   suck ?   it ?   up ?   and ?   admit ?   defeat ?
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Not helpful? You might try using the wildcards * and ? to find the word you're looking for. For example, use
refu*to search for words beginning with refu, or
*featto search for words ending with feat
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