Sorry, no online dictionaries contain the exact phrase holding back tears.
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Reverse dictionary results:
1. choking up
 2. suppressing emotions
3. fighting back tears
4. trying not to cry
5. restrain
6. blink
7. choke
8. choked
9. restraint
10. backward
 11. detain
12. pullback
13. remember
14. retraction
15. surcingle
16. controlled
17. detention
18. inhibitory
19. retractor
20. ritenuto
 21. selected
22. withholding
23. forbearance
24. monitored
25. unstinting
26. wash
27. give
28. tearing
29. salt
30. tear
 31. crying
32. dry
33. rip
34. run
35. runs
36. bandage
37. bandaged
38. bandaging
39. draw
40. move

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You can look up the words in the phrase individually using these links:   holding ?   back ?   tears ?
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